And it’s true, they don’t all forget. One or two of them generally remember my birthday. And one or two will remember Mother’s Day to the extent of calling. But Psycho Mom wants SO MUCH MORE. She wants what all those moms who get royally treated on Mother’s Day get. Thanks for commenting. I had figured out which Amber you were by the context but it was good to have that confirmed too!

I hate it, every freaking year, when my friend tells me that “their daughter took them out for Mother’s Day brunch & the spa, their other daughter is taking them out for MD dinner, and the day following MD, their son is taking them to the Museum”. And as you said, seeing the love on facebook… Every year i have to endure hearing stories like this. *sigh*

It’s not that my kids don’t love me. I know they do. There are just more important things in their lives happening now. It’s that i’ve never forced them to do anything, and i don’t nag at them either… so i sit forgotten while their lives move on. I should say that two of my kids do remember me on Mother’s Day and at least call me… but the other two don’t. It’s the latter two that i’m moaning about mostly. But none of them seem to know when my birthday is though. I just don’t understand that.

I must say that your becoming a phoenix having something to do with it… I think that my oldest was bent out of shape by my own phoenix-happening as well. That definitely could be part of it.

Anyway, your nagging them so that they don’t WANT to call you, or my never nagging them and they just don’t THINK to call me… it doesn’t matter. Same result. So i wouldn’t beat yourself up too much over that.

Phee… i love your writing, your photography and your music. Your openness & honesty… You are a true all-around artist!

*hug* amber (Hope… if you have more Amber friends…)

Neil, it’s true, these are very primal instincts that become awakened when we procreate, and before that happens, it’s impossible to understand. I don’t think I’m being hard on myself, just working it through in writing… writing is therapy, as well as my drug of choice.

We like to think we’re so advanced, so evolved, so beyond the drives that define many of the creatures on this planet, but we’re not, really. We’ve been afraid of the dark ever since there really were nasty things lurking just beyond the campfire, or just outside the cave. We’re hardwired -still- to nurture, and to want that connection with children we created that seems so natural, so pre-ordained.

You’re not psycho mom. You’re just human. Don’t be hard on yourself.

may i send this to my mother?

thank you …

Jean