mental hygiene
Time for some mental hygiene, brush the teeth of my soul to sparkling brightness. I have limited hopes, though; the look of the outdoors today is as dreary and dark as I feel, so realistically, chances for change are limited, being the weather-dependent faerie that I am.
Somewhere in the heart of my darkness is a stake which was meant to slay the vampire; the trouble is, the vamp’s victims become themselves undead, so the well-meant weapon was stuck into my own once-beating center. Now, pinned to the ground I find myself bound by limits to my fullness. Dark? O yes, this dreary pain needs be expressed, though no one is likely to be impressed by its soul-sucking angst.
Did you not hear me say, the vampire is me? That darn stake didn’t kill, for how can the undead be killed? merely trapped me, sapped my energy and locked me into this coffin of choiceless, noiseless, changeless, cheerless, hopeless, deathless, oh you get the drift I’m sure.
What am I trying to say? Spit it out, get over this hump, lift up that slumped lump of self from the floor, off the ground, unbind the bound or be forever found lacking, slacking off from assigned tasks.
Get the fuck UP already.
I’m supposed to be inspiring, living the truth I dare to spout like some kind of teacher, a preacher who practices, so better stop showing these blemishes and warts on my naked doughy belly already!
Oops, did I say that out loud?
March 22nd, 2008 at 8:02 am
Hi Sweetie, “beware the ides of March” they say (think it was Shakespeare and had something to do with paying taxes?) Everyone I meet lately seems to be down in the dumps or else laughing loudly and overly happy, possibly as a means of warding off that down in the dumps feeling.. This time of year physical ailments are rampant as well. Half of Fraser Lake has pnuemonia or the flu. My brother has accepted that March and April are always a low-point for him-in past years he’s had heart attacks/angina/strokes. I’m pleased that he is now reconciled to his disabilities and allows for when he’s more vulnerable. He says “When May comes around I know I’m going to live awhile longer”
Take good care and think good thoughts! love Mom
p.s received my final Canadian rejection the other day - have since queried an international literary agency called WL Writers’ Literary Agency based in the States and they do want to see the manuscript. David-the screenplay guy- is still considering adapting part of the book into a play - not much money in Canada right now for any kind of endeavor though…
March 22nd, 2008 at 3:47 pm
Heheh… the Ides of March means, the 15th, and ‘Beware the Ides of March’ is what the soothsayer told Julius Caesar as a warning about when he would be assassinated. I wrote that on the 20th, safely past the Ides, but March is March, sigh. April is my month to live again (maybe because my birthday is in April).
Congrats on the literary agent thing, keep me posted…