roller-coasting
Days pass, mood changes from hope to despair, from self-affirmation to self-despite. This roller-coaster addles my soul and confuses my mind, making me blind and stupid except when I writhe in washes of brilliance too bright to handle followed by darkness. I declare it is worth it, for the resulting long-term gain is called by some growth, by others evolution, and I continue to become more of what it is I am becoming, though slower than I would wish. Eyes now open, now closed tight, hearing now numb with noise and now exalted by music, I swim through the world.